I’m kind of freaking out some of the time right now. In my mind, I mean. Recently I had one of those days that I will remember forever: April 25 to be exact. It was one of those turning-point-in-my-life days. I might have suspected at the time that it would be one of those days, but I am sure now. I wrote a tiny bit about it here.
On that day in the span of 15 minutes
What would I do if I could do anything I wanted? How do I even know what I want? I used to wonder a lot about this and get really upset because I never felt like I had answers. I got overwhelmed trying to find my true passion or purpose in life. I read so many books and took tests and classes in an effort to figure it all out.
I remember literally crying when I took a class that included exploring finding our passion. During a quiet reflective writing period, I remember staring at one of the questions on the paper: “When you were a kid what did you want to be when you grew up?” I just cried and wanted to scream “I don’t KNOW. I don’t remember EVER knowing this!!!”
Shoes on in the house? “I just swept!”
Crumbs and dirty feet on the couch? “Oh good grief!”
“Be gentle!”
“Why didn’t you finish that in time?”
“What is wrong with you?”